HAVE A HOAGIE AT HOGAN’S BURGER BAR
BY: EVERLY MORELAND
PHOTOGRAPHY BY: PENGUIN IMAGES and EVERLY MORELAND
During a much needed vacation in the beautiful Granite Falls I decided after a long day at the beach that I would stop by the local, and much talked about, Hogan’s Burger Bar.
It may not be much to look at but the area it is in is breathtaking.
I was greeted by the very welcoming Javier Mullins who seated me almost immediately. The seat was wooden and uncomfortable and if I shifted too much I would probably get a splinter in my plum. But the view and atmosphere was worth it.
My server Ramin Eddy took my order shortly. Ramin asked me how I was enjoying the lovely Granite Falls and chatted with me about sights I should see and assured me that the chef, Xzavier Gunderson made the best burgers around. Ramin made me feel very welcome.
The music was a jaunty backyard rock beat and the decor was…quaint. Very simple no frills.
For my appetizer Ramin recommended the Chef’s Special Sour Punch and Chips and Salsa. I loved it. The chips were made on site and the salsa was fresh and also handmade. The sour punch was so good, very well made and refreshing after the hot beach. The only drawback during my meal was all of the bugs. They should have had a few handy bug zappers, but I think the possibility for bug carcass burgers was a drawback.
After I finished my meal renowned food critic (truthfully he is a hack),Cash Raymond, showed up in his ridiculous turtleneck. I mean really, it is hot and you are in the woods. What a weirdo.
For my main course I decided on another Sour Punch and the, according to Ramin, world famous Hamburger by chef Xzavier. It was easily the best hamburger I have had. Well since it had a deliciously gooey cheese then I guess I should call it a cheeseburger. The bun was nicely toasted,it had a great meat to bread ratio, and the meat was perfectly medium well. The pickle gave it just the perfect zip. I would definitely be back.
For my final meal, dessert, I chose Water because I had enough Sour Punch and Chocolate Cake. It was moist and the icing was sweet but not too sweet. A perfect end to a greasy and fantastic meal.
The best part? No food poisoning.
- Appetizer: Sour Punch (19§) and Chips and Salsa (3§)
- Main Course: Sour Punch (19§) and Hamburger ( 6§)
- Dessert: Water (0§) and Chocolate Cake (5 §)
Food Quality: 5 /5 Plumbobs
It was no gourmet resturant but it was very filling and great tasting and I did not get sick. Sometimes a burger and cake is the best thing.
Food Creativity : 3/5 Plumbobs
Nothing out of the box or experimental but the Chef’s use of seasoning and technique made it his own.
Service : 5/5 Plumbobs
I got all three courses extremely fast and I was welcomed with many smiles and Ramin, my server, went out of his way to make me feel at home.
Atmosphere: 5/5 Plumbobs
I enjoyed the laid-back atmosphere and the view was spectacular.
Date night scale: 3 1/2 /5
It was nothing special mood or lighting wise but it would be a nice place to take a lover after a beautiful day at the beach and it offers a view that could truly be romantic if one tried.
Overall score: 4 /5 Plumbobs
- Bang for your buck : Great classic diner food at a really cheap price. Definitely worth it.
Verdict: This may be a dive but I didn’t get food poisoning unlike at Chez Llama so that is definitely a plus. I loved each course and I got to watch the sunset with a view of the beautiful mountains. I would go here again and if you are in Granite Falls this is a must visit.
4 out of 5 Plumbobs- Go!
Eat well. Eat often. And Eat only the best!
About the Author:
Everly Moreland is a Young Adult who is a self-proclaimed foodie, home- taught chef, and prominent member of the Windenburg Branch of the Upper Crusts. She loves to make friends and is an avid activist for the Preservation of Emily the Friendly Neighborhood Loch-Ness. She lives in Windenburg with her beloved goldfish Cracker and maintains an intensively active lifestyle to ensure that none of the delicious food she consumes goes straight to her hips.